A Revolutionary Key to Practicing Self-Love and Becoming Whole

Have you ever thought about what it is that motivates (influences, causes) you to do the things that you do and behave the way you behave? 

Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs is a motivational theory that seeks to explain these questions. We were created with specific needs and when those needs aren't met it actually motivates us, puts us into action, to meet our needs. 

So, what happens when we're unaware of what our needs are or how to meet them in healthy ways? We still try to meet them, but we may try and meet them in unhealthy ways. In addition to the unhealthy consequences, ultimately, the need still goes unmet... 

When we attempt to meet a need in an unhealthy way it can often be momentarily and superficially satisfying, giving us just enough of a feeling that we've met that need, that we develop a habit of "meeting" that need in that unhealthy way. So next time that need arises (and we're subconsciously or consciously motivated to meet it) we do the same thing all over again. The need continues to go unmet and the consequences of that unhealthy habit build and build. 

For example, when we're exhausted throughout the day we reach for one caffeinated drink after another - we feel energized, the need has been met! Or has it?

What we're actually needing is more and better quality sleep, and possibly more nutrients in our diet. The unhealthy habit of coffee (for others, it may be a sugar hit) is momentarily disguising our need for sleep and nutrients, but it is short lasting and the consequences build up over time in the form of hormone imbalance, impaired brain activity, depression, weight gain, compromised immune system, ... need I continue? To make matters worse, those consequences end up negatively affecting everything else in your life... 

How do you break the cycle of unhealthy habits? For starters, you become aware of what it is you actually need and you learn how to meet it in a healthy way. You may need to ask for help!

Then, you may have to intentionally silence everything in you that is telling you to meet that need the way you're used to, the way that's familiar to you. You may have to ignore how you feel and what you think until you rewire yourself with the healthy habit that replaces the unhealthy one. 

Sometimes, you may even have to talk to yourself like your mom or dad would have when you were a child: You have to tell yourself, "Hey, you may not like this - but this is what's good for you and it will get easier with time, trust me. I'm doing this because I love you!"

 

Tough love.

That's the revolutionary key to practicing self-love and becoming whole.

Doing what's good for yourself, not because you always want to, but because it's what you need (and deserve).

You've got this.

Love yourself, for real.

You're worth it.